Boy, Someone’s Totally Blitzed

Keyser may actually have to break down and do some work today, diagnosis so we’ll see how things go. But in case postings are light, and here’s a little tid bit to make sure that Keyser’s anxious fans don’t think that the recent death of the canary betokens any bad fumes in the lower depths of the Lair:

Seems this picture comes from the MySpace page of a (now ex-) New England Patriots cheerleader, who is seen here helping vandalize a drunk friend’s body by drawing graffiti all over it. Apparently, the thirteen pensises that she and the friend drew might have passed muster with team management (to whom someone finked the photo), but the swastika on the chin was a deal breaker.

Anyway, what struck Keyser was how drunk the vandalizee must be. Keyser doesn’t know about you, but the very thought of having someone drawing with a sharpy all over the flank just below the ribs is enough to make Keyser flinch. Keyser’s dentist does some sort of lymph testing thing that involves him placing his fingers on the sides of Keyser’s neck just below the jaw and rubbing in a circular motion. This treatment never fails to make Keyser laugh convulsively, somewhat to the dentist’s consternation.

So, if you’re lucky enough to come upon a passed out Keyser, keep your sharpies to yourself!

Anyway, the vandalizer has a sort of unsavory air about her, don’t you think? If you check out the source, you can find another picture of the vandalzing (the other vandalizer is better looking) as well as some shots of the now defrocked cheerleader cheerleading.

(Sorry if this isn’t to the taste of incorrigible Keyser commenter Big Daddy!)

Real Reason Hillary’s Withdrawing

Damn, sildenafil that woman cannot sing!

Holy shit! Keyser hasn’t heard such a racket since the last time he attended the cat skinning festival in scenic Szeged. Couldn’t she just mouth it? No, Keyser guesses not (after all, that’s why Bill had to seek solace from Monica Lewinsky).

"Call ‘Em Quick and Get the Movie Rights!"

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[Post scriptum. These vermin got sentenced to four years for the male and five for the female (who kept at it even after her initial arrest). Good riddance to bad rubbish.]