Perceptive readers here at the Lair may have noticed the appearance a few days ago of the “Stat Counter” logo to the left. Well, no rx a correspondent of Keyser had reported to him the peculiar fact that “Keyser Soze Democrats comes in #3 out of more than 17, purchase 000″ in a google search. Very gratifying no doubt, though one has to wonder how many googlers previously unaware of Keyser’s existence (the fools!) were likely to search for those three words.
Anyhoo, this news made Keyser curious about the actual extent of his readership, particularly in light of the large amount of scurrilous (if not outright defamatory) email that he receives from Svans and Laz (not to mention all those dyspeptic Mingrelians). So, after fiddling around on the Intrawebz with his usual combination of genius and naiveté, Keyser decided to make use of the facilities nicely provided by the Irish lads at Stat Counter.
At first, Keyser just checked out the gross numbers, but in a lull in this afternoon’s business activities, Keyser decided to check out a few of the other statistics available. We’ll start off “lite” and move on later to more detailed analyses of the “traffic” (cool, sort of sounds like some sort of Bletchley Park cryptographical stuff, no?), so for the moment we’ll stick to national statistics.
Whereas Keyser was expecting a huge number of his “hits” to come from the Caucasus, it turns out that those folks must have odd reading habits and haven’t visited in the four days since the counter was installed. In fact, Keyser’s readership breaks down as follows:
Saudi Arabia: 1%
WTF? Keyser guesses that the American traffic is generated by the political stuff about Sarah Palin. The German hits presumably come from the death threats against that guy who wrote the song about the pope. Not sure about the Canadians. Guess they just have good taste (or perhaps they googled “Keyser Soze Canada” and got this). Finally, who’s that guy from Saudi Arabia? Did he google “Keyser Soze Sheikh Salih Ibn al-Luhaydan” and get this? Or perhaps he wanted more information about how Mickey Mouse Must Die? Whatever he was up to, Keyser presumes he was not a happy customer. Sorry, dude!
But Keyser does want to know where all his Abkhaz traffic has gone. Really, are you guys still so pissed about all the postings about Georgia? Can’t we kiss and make up? Remember, even Keyser has a heart (somewhere)–come back, my Caucasian friends!