Archive for the ‘Foreplay’ Category

When Life Gives You Lemons…

September 13, 2015 by Keyser Söze | No Comments | Filed in breasts, Foreplay

give ’em a good squeeze!

No Scuffs

August 23, 2015 by Keyser Söze | No Comments | Filed in Babes, Foreplay

One Ringy Dingy…

March 10, 2015 by Keyser Söze | 2 Comments | Filed in Advertisement, Be All You Can Be, Christmas, Demonology, Do It Yourself, Doggy-Style, Everyone's Human, Feminism, Foreplay, Hobbies, PSA, Pussy Power, Satan

To tell you the truth, online it’s been Keyser’s overall experience that the Devil frequently acts like an old curmudgeon on Hallowe’en. He keeps the lights off and doesn’t answer the bell. On the other hand, when he does answer, it is partay time!

Home, Sweet, Home

January 25, 2015 by Keyser Söze | 6 Comments | Filed in Babes, Bad Dates, Bad Habits, BDSM, Be All You Can Be, Don't Ask Don't Tell, Don't Look Down, Dream the Impossible Dream, Dumb Idea of the Day, Enlightenment, Ethical Depravity, Everyone's Human, Fetishes, Foreplay, Freaks, Fun and Games, God is Dead, How Dumb Can You Be?, Inter-species Sex, Invasion of Privacy, It's All a Matter of Taste, Keyser, Keyser is an Idiot, Keyser man of Mystery, Keyser's Personal Hell, Keyser's Weird Fantasies, Kinky Sex, Let the Good Times Roll, Lunacy, Madness, Mrs. S, People are Nuts, Personal Relationships, Philosophy, Places to Avoid, PSA, Psychology, Pull the Other One, Pussy Power, Redheads Rule, Scary Idea of the Day, Self-Hatred, Self-Improvement, Sex, Sex Through the Ages, Some People Are Nuts, Some People Never Learn, The Horror, Theater of the Absurd, Thought for the Day, Triumph of the Human Spirit, War and Deliverance, We're Doomed, What in the Fuck is the Matter with People?, Will of God, You Have a Dirty Mind

One of the strange things about life is that it may turn out that you’re entirely wrong about something you’ve always thought you knew everything about. Take your old friend Keyser. (“Please, ambulance ” ha ha!) You’d think that after all these years, I’d know what was going on in my own head. Turns out […]

Bed Time!

December 2, 2014 by Keyser Söze | No Comments | Filed in Babes, Foreplay, Let the Good Times Roll

Not to Worry, Baby, We Know We’re Enslaved

November 25, 2014 by Keyser Söze | No Comments | Filed in Babes, Feminism, Fetishes, Foreplay, Fun and Games, Personal Relationships, Sex

Her: Want to be my slave for the night? Him: What’s in it for me? Her: Are you stupid? Slaves get nothing.

Who Said You Could Have a Cupcake, Bitch?

October 6, 2014 by Keyser Söze | 2 Comments | Filed in Babes, Foreplay, Lesbians, Personal Relationships

Appointment with Destiny

December 22, 2012 by Keyser Söze | 3 Comments | Filed in Babes, Bad Dates, Foreplay, Travel

The Grass is Always Greener…

November 9, 2012 by Keyser Söze | No Comments | Filed in Advertisement, Be All You Can Be, Beauty Contest, Feminism, Fine Dining, Foreplay, Gift that Keeps on Giving, Girlz' Korner, Natural Beauty, Nature's Goodness, Neat Stuff, Performance Art, Sight Seeing, You Have a Dirty Mind

“Who? Me?”: Supreme Court Nominee Confirmation Hearing Edition

July 1, 2010 by Keyser Söze | No Comments | Filed in Bullshit, Democrats, Demonology, Foreplay, Fun and Games, Home improvment, Hope and Change, Language, Lying

Some languages make a formal distinction between a past tense that signifies an event that the speaker can attest to through personal knowledge and one that is known to the speaker through hearsay or inference. For instance, no rx in Turkish, health if you’re on the phone talking to someone in another city and they […]

  • Motto

    As Keyser's father used to say, "If you have to ask, I'm not going to tell you."

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