I’ve Heard the Screams of the Vegetables

Apparently, viagra the tender hearts over at the Nude York Timez have only just clued in to the fact that when fluffy goes out the backyard, murder and mayhem ensue, to the tune of 2.8 billion birds and 14.67 zillion voles per year. Of course, if they read the Lair, they’d already know this, but Keyser’s pretty sure that if they did, their beady little heads would explode, so the delusions they’ve labored under thitherto should come as no surprise.

So, the next time you pass by one of your leftard cat-hating neighbors, just hum this tune smugly to yourself. (And the group is Canadian, so extra points to any Canadian Nationalists out there!)

“In Helvetica. Period”: The ’60s in a Coke Ad

This video pertains to some of your old friend Keyser’s latest interests, here like graphic design, sick typography and the Decline of Western Civilization. Oh, pilule and if you watch the show Mad Men, this gives you some idea of where it could be going if it actually wanted to say something meaningful about the ’60s rather than being naughty porn for SWPL women. Since the show is about an advertising agency, there would be some plot element in which changes in the style of graphic design symbolize broader changes in society. Instead, we have no real idea what their supposedly cutting-edge adverts (as the Brits say) are like, and instead we get to tut-tut the ad boys for not being nice to the negroes and swoon when Don Draper takes the bait and gives Mrs. Draper what she’s been yearning for on the floor.

Anyway, this video is from the movie Helvetica. Yes, you read that right (and proved it for yourself if you clicked the link). There’s a whole movie about the revolution brought about in graphic design in the ’60s by the font Helvetica. This scene here is totally cool. It gives you a real sense of what was going through the minds of modernist thinkers when they wanted to sweep away the Beaux Arts trash of the Victorian era and replace it with cold sweeping towers of glass and steel. I’m sure the Bolsheviks must have felt the same way in 1917, poised at the dawn of a new era when the corrupting rot of the past would be uprooted to make way for the glorious future of modernity! …And we all know how that story turned out.

Can you imagine how bracing and thrilling that [the new style of graphic design] must have been? That must have seemed that you could crawl through a desert, with your mouth just caked with filthy dust, and then someone’s offering you a clear, refreshing, distilled glass of water to clear away all this horrible kind of burden of history. It must have been fantastic.

And to some extent, this is true. Here’s the change in company name and logo he’s talking about:

You know, I can remember noting this sort of change back in the ’80s. The old National Drovers’ Bank and Trust Co. of Poughkeepsie would move to Delaware so it could change 47% interest on its credit cards and change its name to something bland like Ameribanc. It must say something about Keyser’s overall cultural allegiances that I generally preferred the old versions, with their images of a staid tradition, to some bland new plasticky moniker, but I guess that’s why Keyser never went into advertising.

Some of this stuff was cool.

Most of it not so much.

Oh, and for all you who don’t watch MM, here’s Don and Megan doing a Fifty Shades of Grey kind of thing.